Guild Forums
 
HomeFAQSearchRegisterLog in
Well the big day is here! Please can you add all your character names to the Thread Chaos created so that we can add you to the guild Very Happy

Share | 
 

 Fancy being a Pastafarian?

View previous topic View next topic Go down 
AuthorMessage
Snoopkitten
Admin
avatar

Posts : 59
Points : 1988
Reputation : 0
Join date : 2012-06-18
Age : 33
Location : North yorkshire

PostSubject: Fancy being a Pastafarian?   Thu Jun 21, 2012 6:41 am

I just became ordained as a minister for the Church of the Flying Spaghetti monster.

Pastafarian is my religion, and before you say anything...yes, it IS an official religion!

The Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster, while having existed in secrecy for hundreds of years, only recently came into the mainstream when this letter was published in May 2005.

"With millions, if not thousands, of devout worshippers, the Church of the FSM is widely considered a legitimate religion, even by its opponents – mostly fundamentalist Christians, who have accepted that our God has larger balls than theirs."

Some claim that the church is purely a thought experiment, satire, illustrating that Intelligent Design is not science, but rather a pseudoscience manufactured by Christians to push Creationism into public schools. These people are mistaken. The Church of FSM is real, totally legit, and backed by hard science. Anything that comes across as humor or satire is purely coincidental.

Pastafarianism:

~ We believe pirates, the original Pastafarians, were peaceful explorers and it was due to Christian misinformation that they have an image of outcast criminals today
~ We are fond of beer
~ Every Friday is a Religious Holiday
~ We do not take ourselves too seriously
~ We embrace contradictions (though in that we are hardly unique)

This is just a basic outline of the pastafarian background, if you want to know more, click this link (which is where i have quoted the info from).

I do not expect everyone to suddenly become a Pastafarian, however i think that spreading the word a little cant help Very Happy

Now, i shall go raise a mug of rum in the FSM's good name!


Minister Snoop

___________________________________________________
Rev. Snoop
Back to top Go down
http://mayhem.forumotion.co.uk
Snoopkitten
Admin
avatar

Posts : 59
Points : 1988
Reputation : 0
Join date : 2012-06-18
Age : 33
Location : North yorkshire

PostSubject: Re: Fancy being a Pastafarian?   Thu Jun 21, 2012 9:53 pm

This makes for amusing reading, Pastafarian or not, as you know there are 10 comandments in the bible. The FSM does not believe in telling a pirate what he can and cannot do, so we have the following Eight "I'd Really Rather You Didn'ts

1. I'd really rather you didn't act like a sanctimonious holier-than-thou ass when describing my noodly goodness. If some people don't believe in me, that's okay. Really, I'm not that vain. Besides, this isn't about them so don't change the subject.

2. I'd really rather you didn't use my existence as a means to oppress, subjugate, punish, eviscerate, and/or, you know, be mean to others. I don't require sacrifices, and purity is for drinking water, not people.

3. I'd really rather you didn't judge people for the way they look, or how they dress, or the way they talk, or, well, just play nice, okay? Oh, and get this into your thick heads: woman = person. man = person. Samey = Samey. One is not better than the other, unless we're talking about fashion and I'm sorry, but I gave that to women and some guys who know the difference between teal and fuchsia.

4. I'd really rather you didn't indulge in conduct that offends yourself, or your willing, consenting partner of legal age AND mental maturity. As for anyone who might object, I think the expression is "go f*ck yourself," unless they find that offensive in which case they can turn off the TV for once and go for a walk for a change.

5. I'd really rather you didn't challenge the bigoted, misogynistic, hateful ideas of others on an empty stomach. Eat, then go after the bitches.

6. I'd really rather you didn't build multi million-dollar synagogues / churches / temples / mosques / shrines to my noodly goodness when the money could be better spent (take your pick):
1. Ending poverty
2. Curing diseases
3. Living in peace, loving with passion, and lowering the cost of cable
I might be a complex-carbohydrate omniscient being, but I enjoy the simple things in life. I ought to know. I AM the creator.

7. I'd really rather you didn't go around telling people I talk to you. You're not that interesting. Get over yourself. And I told you to love your fellow man, can't you take a hint?

8. I'd really rather you didn't do unto others as you would have them do unto you if you are into, um, stuff that uses a lot of leather/lubricant/vaseline. If the other person is into it, however (pursuant to #4), then have at it, take pictures, and for the love of Mike, wear a CONDOM! Honestly, it's a piece of rubber. If I didn't want it to feel good when you did it I would have added spikes, or something.

___________________________________________________
Rev. Snoop
Back to top Go down
http://mayhem.forumotion.co.uk
 
Fancy being a Pastafarian?
View previous topic View next topic Back to top 
Page 1 of 1

Permissions in this forum:You cannot reply to topics in this forum
 :: Guests :: Snoop's Tavern-
Jump to: